Foreword: Ladies and gentlemen, please give a hearty welcome to Peloma Alexandria Peralta, whom we found rummaging outside the eGamer headquarters looking for old discarded games, and decided to put to more constructive tasks. Such as writing. And not just opinion columns either. You’ll see…
In the life of a gamer if you are lucky you find someone special to co-op your life with and if you are cursed like I am you are doomed to roam the land, now and again stumbling upon a decent human being only to find out they are a shape shifter who is actually a level 50 demon.
I’ve come across articles that claim to help gamers with their lonely state; this is not one of them. Instead this is just a simple guide, not a walkthrough, on what to say and what not say when meeting a female while playing online or offline when you take a break from gaming. (Please note this only works if the intended target is a hardcore gamer and not of those Wii girls.)
Scenario: Playing CoD or BF3 and you realise you have a female in your party. Here are some conversation starters and stoppers.
Don’t say: “Oh nice, a girl gamer.”
The only time you should ever refer to a female gamer as a girl is if she is under the age of 12 and even then she is too young for you bro so move on.
Do say: “Hi –insert XBL or PSN alias- nice to see a new nick in the lobby.”
It’s a good greeting because you are not fussing over her gender, she is just one of the boys.
Don’t say: “Good job,” every time she kills someone.
That’s a big NO NO unless the female is using her feet to operate a controller then by all means it’s a good job otherwise it just comes across condescending.
Do say: “You had some good kills in that match so I take it you play often”
By saying this you have forced or encouraged her to reveal more about herself.
Don’t say: “What’s your name?”
Unless it’s an interrogation you should never ask that the first time you play with her; that’s why Microsoft and Sony allow gamers to have an alias when they play online, so use that until she tells you her name.
Do say: “That was an awesome gaming session, do you mind if I add you to my friends list so we can play some other time?”
This will afford you the perfect opportunity to play more often thus getting to know her better. If the answer is a no don’t fret friend, maybe you were creeping her out a little too much, there is always next time.
Scenario: At BT Games or Look & Listen and there is a female browsing the RPG or any other section. (Stay away from the Wii section!!!)
Don’t say: “Getting that for your boyfriend or brother?”
If you have ever said that then you have my permission to exile yourself from the human race. Females game, get over it, it’s not a new phenomenon and your default assumption anytime you see a female in a game store should be she is there to buy HERSELF some games.
Do say: “You’re in the right section if you are looking for re-playability.”
No awkward greetings or stalker-ish stares, just a simple friendly observation.
Don’t say: “I game a lot, WWE is my favourite game.”
Wrestling is a sport mostly watched by bi-curious men, that is the only explanation of why a straight male would enjoy the sight of half-naked men groping each other. Never reveal too much of your gaming habits unless asked and even then if you play WWE that is between you and your console.
Do say: “Have you played –insert your favourite game-? If not, I recommend picking that up as well.”
Giving her options without sounding like you’re fathering her is always a good thing.
Don’t say: “May I help you?”
Unless you are a shop assistant never ask, even if she is not equipped with a tongue she will sign you if she needs assistance. Unless asked, never ever offer.
Do say: “Do you game online, maybe we can play some time because I struggle finding decent games with locals.”
If she does game online and gives you her online ID it will be the perfect opportunity to get to know her and to keep in contact without asking for her number. New friend achievement or trophy unlocked.
I hope this helps even a tiny bit but I have to add this disclaimer: it might come as a shock but a majority, if not all females that game online do it for fun while socialising with other gamers and NOT to hook up, even the females that you see browsing games at your favourite gaming store.
That is all from me; happy hunting.